In a country in an age of relativism, one begins to wonder if there are really any absolutes. It prompts an examination of one’s beliefs, ideals, and definitions of the everyday things: “How did I get that?” “Why do I think like this?” “Did I come to this conclusion on my own, or was I hand-fed?”
Before the beginning of my own self-examination and self-definition, I could be offended quite easily. I would constantly hear those older than me, college students mostly, call out young Christians. “The only reason you think that way is because you’re parents do, you’ve never questioned it,” they would say. Of course they applied this statement not only to religious views, but also political, social, racial, educational, and the list goes on.
I think anyone, when initially questioned about his or her beliefs, will respond in a very defensive manner, which of course I did. Sometimes, this can be almost unreasonable (although understandable). But hopefully, there is a second reaction, regardless of how much later it takes effect. Words are incredibly powerful, and despite the intelligence of the person wielding them, sometimes you can’t help but let them seep in.
I tend to be very introspective, and although opinions flow as freely as the extortionist-priced fuel we inevitably consume, sometimes I feel the need to actually stop . . . and listen.
After I allowed my pride to take enough of a hit to truly consider my beliefs and their original source, I began a fulfilling (while at times confusing and frustrating) pursuit. It led me through theological discussions, environmental research, many different schools, and even- many different friends.
I realize now that instead of a pursuing “truth,” I was really pursuing identity. Not that I didn’t have one to begin with, but just that I was so horrified with being . . . that person. That person that is so incredibly passive about their receipt of knowledge and opinion, that it’s difficult to take them seriously.
Please don’t misunderstand, it’s not even that I necessarily disagree with these types of people or their opinions at all, but often it appears that what they mistake for passion and personal conviction is actually just a desperate attempt to hold on to their safety blanket. AKA: pre-established ideas that were covertly passed off as their own since childhood.
However, I do respect a certain amount of teaching and instruction. Parents instill particular notions and beliefs in their child because they believe they’re right. Can you ever imagine raising your child with beliefs opposing your own? Not going to happen.
I suppose my issue is just with: never questioning anything. I’m not encouraging a complete upheaval of your personal world (or that of your parents). Because to me, that is just simply: rebellion.
Of course, there are rare cases of those who really discover themselves, by accident, in those situations. However, I feel like those decisions are made more in the frantic pursuit of independence rather than true identity. (Which is normal, but I want to distinguish the difference in motives, though subconsciously determined).
I feel like a line from the Bright Eyes song, lover I don’t have to love, completely exposes our need for purpose, even if it’s not our own: “I need some meaning I can memorize.”
So many go through life unmoved by a life-altering individual discovery, because it’s easier that way. I understand. When you begin the process of questioning, it feels like a slippery slope. Where will it stop? Will you end up an empty shell of the person you used to be? Will you end up a cynic, consumed with doubt? It can be daunting.
You would indeed be opening yourself up to the possibility that this whole time, you were wrong. Yet, if you sincerely believe in your opinions- then research, discussion, and examination will only strengthen your convictions. You can hold your head high, and say with certainty: this is MY story.
When have you EVER heard an inspiring story or a moving testimony, one that wrenched your gut from your body and left goose bumps in its wake, that began with “My parents told me . . .” No, it is the stories of personal mistakes, trial and error, zealous pursuit of self or God that led to knowledge, redemption, and true passion.
So the next time you hear a testimony lacking inspiration, an opinion lacking conviction, a person lacking self- you can just smile knowing they haven’t taken the plunge . . . yet; Unless, of course, that person is you.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Friday, December 12, 2008
The Difference Between Write and Wrong
I've learned a lot about myself during the process of writing this semester, perhaps too much. In my opinion, journalists are confronted with numerous challenges when developing an article: from the broadest, most common predicament to the journalist faces their specialty problems which seem tailor-made to inhibit their progress. As is my case.
The most humbling is accepting an assignment in which you do not yet see the significance. Another challenge is one that relates to personal standards: research the heck out of your story, don't ask obvious questions, don't take the easy angle. The last challenge that is often the most difficult for many writers is the process of editing. There is a certain amount of objectivity required to discern, out of the hundreds of facts you may have, which are truly interesting and relevant.
Organization is such an essential part of developing any written piece. After changing my major from English to journalism, I ran with the possibilities and options that this new creativity allowed. However, I might have gone a tad overboard in creative license and completely forgotten any sort of standard or restrictions in writing, leaving me wandering in the overwhelming clutter of my mind.
Writing for me is a necessity. I really couldn't imagine how insane I would go if I couldn't organize my thoughts on paper. I'm such a visual person, that anything auditory is just gibberish. It's almost a handicap, I swear. My friend had the same work schedule for years, but he'd never written it down, so I'd always ask him- "when do you work again?" Thankfully he's quite patient ( :
Almost three-quarters of the paperwork I have in my house consist of lists: To-do lists, To-call lists, Homework lists, To-buy, To-save for, etc. I suppose I need to get all my worries and nonsense out of my head in order to focus on more pertinent issues.
I never recognize the significance of my thoughts until they're in writing; it's like they don't exist. If you don't think I'm crazy yet, just wait. Most of the time, I'm incredibly busy. I get so caught up in everyday tasks and obligations that I don't have time to get lost in my thoughts, let alone write them down.
This unfortunately comes with its own little quirky consequences. If I haven't written for a while I start to think in narrative. That's right- I begin to NARRATE my own life, like I'm a character in a book. It's pretty weird, especially when I don't realize I'm doing it!
"She walked to her car, trying her best not to think about him. Focusing instead of the cold weather she shivered. 'It's FINALLY winter!' she sighed. Immediately she began a mental inventory of her closet. 'Ugh, I don't have any winter clothes,' she thought. Growing up in Southern California all she ever really needed was a coat to put over her summer clothes.
'Hmmm, I probably need to invest in some actual winter stuff. She watched a professor walk by wrapped in a cozy-looking scarf with chic boots that came up to her calf. 'Adults have winter clothes. Adults are organized and put together. I wonder if I'll every feel like an adult?' She shook her head and thought 'most adults probably ALSO have decent bank accounts to allow for such expenses.' Just a few more months and she'd be done with school. Maybe then, she’d leave the world as she knows it behind . . . and finally grow up."
If you've seen Stranger Than Fiction you could better understand my dilemma. To fix this problem, I force myself to keep writing tools with me at all times- to prevent a complete psychotic break institutionalization:
"Hey what's she in here for?"
"Oh her? She thinks she's living in a book, she only talks in third person."
"Oh that's terrible!"
"Yeah, if only she would've taken the time to write...."
Another important habit I've found useful (which I'm sure almost everyone has discovered before me and has been keeping it a secret) is simple goals. I have a tendency when writing, whether journaling or writing for assignment, to digress on a whim. Especially during journaling, which is usually completely without direction, I jump from subject to subject in more of a rant than anything.
On bad days, all I want to do is to spill my guts without inflicting harm on another human being. But in the future, when I go back and read my entries, it's as if another person had written it. In the chaos of pure passion my writing is reduced to a fifth grade level, with horrible grammar, misspellings, and the occasional profanity. If nothing, it's incredibly amusing. But it has also served another purpose in revealing to me the pitfalls of chaotic writing.
As an experiment, I begin to give myself "assignments" - focus for my scattered musings. The results blew me away. Most of my thoughts on the specified subject magically condensed, clarified, and flowed to create a coherent article.
Being such a disorganized wreck for so long, I finally discovered for myself the secret everyone had been keeping from me (or so I thought): FOCUS.
The most humbling is accepting an assignment in which you do not yet see the significance. Another challenge is one that relates to personal standards: research the heck out of your story, don't ask obvious questions, don't take the easy angle. The last challenge that is often the most difficult for many writers is the process of editing. There is a certain amount of objectivity required to discern, out of the hundreds of facts you may have, which are truly interesting and relevant.
Organization is such an essential part of developing any written piece. After changing my major from English to journalism, I ran with the possibilities and options that this new creativity allowed. However, I might have gone a tad overboard in creative license and completely forgotten any sort of standard or restrictions in writing, leaving me wandering in the overwhelming clutter of my mind.
Writing for me is a necessity. I really couldn't imagine how insane I would go if I couldn't organize my thoughts on paper. I'm such a visual person, that anything auditory is just gibberish. It's almost a handicap, I swear. My friend had the same work schedule for years, but he'd never written it down, so I'd always ask him- "when do you work again?" Thankfully he's quite patient ( :
Almost three-quarters of the paperwork I have in my house consist of lists: To-do lists, To-call lists, Homework lists, To-buy, To-save for, etc. I suppose I need to get all my worries and nonsense out of my head in order to focus on more pertinent issues.
I never recognize the significance of my thoughts until they're in writing; it's like they don't exist. If you don't think I'm crazy yet, just wait. Most of the time, I'm incredibly busy. I get so caught up in everyday tasks and obligations that I don't have time to get lost in my thoughts, let alone write them down.
This unfortunately comes with its own little quirky consequences. If I haven't written for a while I start to think in narrative. That's right- I begin to NARRATE my own life, like I'm a character in a book. It's pretty weird, especially when I don't realize I'm doing it!
"She walked to her car, trying her best not to think about him. Focusing instead of the cold weather she shivered. 'It's FINALLY winter!' she sighed. Immediately she began a mental inventory of her closet. 'Ugh, I don't have any winter clothes,' she thought. Growing up in Southern California all she ever really needed was a coat to put over her summer clothes.
'Hmmm, I probably need to invest in some actual winter stuff. She watched a professor walk by wrapped in a cozy-looking scarf with chic boots that came up to her calf. 'Adults have winter clothes. Adults are organized and put together. I wonder if I'll every feel like an adult?' She shook her head and thought 'most adults probably ALSO have decent bank accounts to allow for such expenses.' Just a few more months and she'd be done with school. Maybe then, she’d leave the world as she knows it behind . . . and finally grow up."
If you've seen Stranger Than Fiction you could better understand my dilemma. To fix this problem, I force myself to keep writing tools with me at all times- to prevent a complete psychotic break institutionalization:
"Hey what's she in here for?"
"Oh her? She thinks she's living in a book, she only talks in third person."
"Oh that's terrible!"
"Yeah, if only she would've taken the time to write...."
Another important habit I've found useful (which I'm sure almost everyone has discovered before me and has been keeping it a secret) is simple goals. I have a tendency when writing, whether journaling or writing for assignment, to digress on a whim. Especially during journaling, which is usually completely without direction, I jump from subject to subject in more of a rant than anything.
On bad days, all I want to do is to spill my guts without inflicting harm on another human being. But in the future, when I go back and read my entries, it's as if another person had written it. In the chaos of pure passion my writing is reduced to a fifth grade level, with horrible grammar, misspellings, and the occasional profanity. If nothing, it's incredibly amusing. But it has also served another purpose in revealing to me the pitfalls of chaotic writing.
As an experiment, I begin to give myself "assignments" - focus for my scattered musings. The results blew me away. Most of my thoughts on the specified subject magically condensed, clarified, and flowed to create a coherent article.
Being such a disorganized wreck for so long, I finally discovered for myself the secret everyone had been keeping from me (or so I thought): FOCUS.
Monday, November 24, 2008
I Need Africa.....
“I need Africa more than Africa needs me” The thought of a contributor needing the cause more than the cause needs a contributor seems to be more common occurrence; especially considering the fad of celebrity-endorsed charities, international adoptions, and every student on campus trumpeting some sort of cause.
It appears that in an attempt to define oneself, portray an image, or sincerely help out another human being there is actually … progress. Does it matter what one’s intentions are? Or is it the outcome alone that should motivate our participation?
For so many, the opportunity to get involved and “make a difference” awakes a warm fuzzy side that reminds us of the glowing look on our mother’s face when we “shared.” Now that we are out of strollers, pigtails, and elementary school, has the need for approval of good deeds subsided?
I should think not. But I have come to the conclusion that it does not reduce the result of the gift, action, etc. The only thing it affects is the deep advantages it bestows on the giver. Of course, praise, admiration and respect among other things will accompany “good deeds.” However, the general “high” that many seek from giving of themselves can fade quickly, and they’re left with nothing.
Although in my opinion, selfish intentions do not negate the “good deed,” it sucks the core out of the action. I’m here to tell you about the mocha club.
This isn’t about fasting from your mocha cravings twice a month so that you can whine to your friends about how you’re such a martyr. This is about the knowledge that in other countries, your donation makes a significant difference. It is the realization that your excessive addiction to the habitual Starbucks run is just that, excessive. You have excess while others don’t necessities.
The mocha-club is a community based organization where members donate $7 a month, the cost of two mochas, to help a variety of causes in Africa. Whether or not your intentions are pure, that for you to decide, but know that you have an obligation… to reject ignorance, and accept responsibility.
For more info check out mochaclub.org
It appears that in an attempt to define oneself, portray an image, or sincerely help out another human being there is actually … progress. Does it matter what one’s intentions are? Or is it the outcome alone that should motivate our participation?
For so many, the opportunity to get involved and “make a difference” awakes a warm fuzzy side that reminds us of the glowing look on our mother’s face when we “shared.” Now that we are out of strollers, pigtails, and elementary school, has the need for approval of good deeds subsided?
I should think not. But I have come to the conclusion that it does not reduce the result of the gift, action, etc. The only thing it affects is the deep advantages it bestows on the giver. Of course, praise, admiration and respect among other things will accompany “good deeds.” However, the general “high” that many seek from giving of themselves can fade quickly, and they’re left with nothing.
Although in my opinion, selfish intentions do not negate the “good deed,” it sucks the core out of the action. I’m here to tell you about the mocha club.
This isn’t about fasting from your mocha cravings twice a month so that you can whine to your friends about how you’re such a martyr. This is about the knowledge that in other countries, your donation makes a significant difference. It is the realization that your excessive addiction to the habitual Starbucks run is just that, excessive. You have excess while others don’t necessities.
The mocha-club is a community based organization where members donate $7 a month, the cost of two mochas, to help a variety of causes in Africa. Whether or not your intentions are pure, that for you to decide, but know that you have an obligation… to reject ignorance, and accept responsibility.
For more info check out mochaclub.org
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Others
Here are some other blogs I've found interesting in relation to philosophy. I don't necessarily agree with all of them- but that would be a boring, bias exploration if I did. The End
http://existentialist.blogspot.com/2005/11/henry-david-thoreau-of-philosophy.html
http://blog.sofeminine.co.uk/blog/seeone_226870_5047928/Be-David/the-social-philosophy-of-Confucius
http://blogthoreau.blogspot.com/
http://www.arashworld.blogspot.com/
http://happinessofbeing.blogspot.com/
http://adventuresinexistence.blogspot.com/
http://existentialist.blogspot.com/2005/11/henry-david-thoreau-of-philosophy.html
http://blog.sofeminine.co.uk/blog/seeone_226870_5047928/Be-David/the-social-philosophy-of-Confucius
http://blogthoreau.blogspot.com/
http://www.arashworld.blogspot.com/
http://happinessofbeing.blogspot.com/
http://adventuresinexistence.blogspot.com/
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
What Are You Waiting For?
So, is it bad that I am skeptical of love? Only God is capable of unconditional love, so maybe we need to lower our expectations a little. We can't expect another person to "complete" us. That's not possible. When we seek after God for our completion then, if he wills it, he could give us someone to enhance our lives and in doing so bring glory to himself. Because he is the creator of relationships. When they are done the right way, it makes him happy. But we need to stop looking for purpose in relationships. All that brings is confusion and heartache. It's a waste of energy. Thank God, if you are single, that you can use this time as a single person to build your relationship with him, thereby completing yourself. When the time comes, you'll be able to offer yourself to your spouse as a whole person, without putting unrealistic expectations on them. You can just sit back and enjoy them as a gift, an addition to your life, not a missing piece. Please try and put things into perspective people. Most of us will be blessed with a spouse eventually. So why are we in such a hurry? You're going to be with that person for the rest of your life! What's a few years difference? This time can be used to serve God and grow in a totally different way than you would if you were married! Every single person has the fear that they will end up alone, or have to settle in the end. But guess what? God doesn't have some twisted sense of humor, and he doesn't get pleasure out of seeing you sad! But what he does have is a plan for this period of your life. It is your choice to either fulfil his plan and his purpose, or to waste your time complaining about being single. God know's the desires of your heart! He's your Dad, and DOES want you to be happy! Stop limiting his love for you and his knowledge of your wants and needs. He knows.
Character
So, I used to think that I had to try harder to be a better person. To be more more like Jesus. I needed to study the Bible more so that I would know HOW to achieve this lofty goal. I needed to be conscientious and make the right choices. But I have recently discovered that while this is a good ideal to work towards, it's not right. First and foremost I need to be seeking what's important to God, not me. I was so sure that me trying to improve my character, morals, and making sacrifices would make God happy. But, he doesn't simply want our sacrifices, he says he wants our obedience. At church, the pastor pointed out that Jesus cared about people. He cared about the ones who were hurting, confused, and seeking for an answer. So that's what we need to be concerned with. Not necessarily our own spiritual condition as much. I already have salvation! How selfish of me to ignore the need out there. If I were to commit to fully serving God, and being used for his ultimate goal, all of my desires to be closer to him, and a stronger person would follow. Sometimes we get so sidetracked with seeking the blessings, the byproducts, that we forget our mission. The great commission.
Universal Disclaimer
UNIVERSAL DISCLAIMER: I don't claim to have this down. I'm a sinner. I'm right along side of you screwing up. I ignore God and disobey Him. But I also love him, and know that no matter what, He is worth obedience. Sometimes I get thoughts on it and want to write them down. And everyone always gets SO hung out on the hypocrite thing. Seriously, we're all hypocrites. I'm sorry if you had a bad experience with Christians preaching one thing and doing another, but that's life. That's not an excuse not go to church, or read your Bible. That's someone else's problem, don't claim it as your own. If we waited till we were perfect to say anything about God, or claim God, or tell our friends about God, or mention God on our MySpace, then nothing would ever happen. We're all human! I don't know if we're scared of misrepresenting Christ and screwing it up for people who are watching our example - which it totally ligit. But we're not preaching our perfection, we're sharing about HIS. And claiming Christianity, is claiming that you're gonna try to live your life in a way that would make God happy. We are going to miss sometimes! But that's okay, as long as you're TRYING. And don't kid yourself, you know when you are and aren't. There's a difference between a sin here and there and a LIFESTYLE of sin. Other times, people are afraid to claim God, because they are scared of getting called out when they screw up. But maybe. . . . that's okay. Maybe we need to get called out. "Hey, aren't you Christian? Why are stumbling drunk, past the point of no return?!" . . . . . . . Hmmmmm, yeah, good point, why AM I???? so please look past my unworthiness to write ANYTHING about a Holy God. And realize, that all I can do is try. here we go-
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